Hey guys, is it next week already? I just woke up from a turkey coma, so I apologize for the severe tardiness of this recap. I got gravy all over the first draft, then it got tossed out with the Christmas decoration wrapping paper and I had to start all over. Excuses excuses, I know.

This week the previews promised us a hostage situation. I'm betting it's going to be Episode Formula #2: House vs. A Worthy Adversary. Instead of the usual Patient of the Week intro, we open on the hospital. Inside, we're treated to a Slo-Mo Cam of Impending Doom™ shot of people in the clinic. 13 is soothing a typical exasperated ER patient. You know the drill: "I've been sitting here for 56 hours bleeding all over the floor, don't you have any doctors working?" These people should know better than to go to a hospital that only has one surgeon. Seriously.

Foreman comes in for a chat with 13. Remember the drug trial he's working on? Just so happens that it's for Huntington's disease. Shut up! I know, right? He offers 13 a spot in the trial. She says no thanks. Eric, if there's anything I've learned about Dr. Remy Hadley in the last year, it's that a helping hand is not the way into her pants. Anywho, hey, look who else is here--it's Zeljko Ivanek! If you don't recognize the name (because I know you get all your Zeljkos mixed up), you'll recognize the face. His IMDB rap sheet helpfully says "he is frequently cast as political or business middlemen of corrupt, shady natures who often end up stabbing somebody in the back." In other words, any run-of-the-mill baddie on 24. He's doing his shady thing now, peeping through the door of Cuddy's office. Who should be in there but House--up to no good, I bet. Besides, how much fun would a hostage faceoff with Cuddy be? (Something I've always wondered: why does a hospital bigwig like Cuddy have her office down in the clinic?) Zzzyzx goes in and asks to see Cuddy. House, messing with Cuddy's desk drawer, blows him off in typical Housian fashion. Zczrycwz walks out, pulls the gun you knew he was packing, and herds 13 and a bunch of random patients into Cuddy's office. "What seems to be the problem?" House deadpans.

"Doc, I have a bad case of typecast."