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All Articles for Cinema Blend Feed: Movie Reviews
Zodiac added 2007-03-01 22:06:23   
300 added 2007-03-01 07:54:07
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Half-way through IDiggersI you may come to the realization that this is a story going nowhere. There isnt any driving motivation, epiphany, or outside dramatic event that will radically change the lives of the films main characters. But at nearly the next moment, youll realize that you dont much care. What is here, while not particularly original or multi-layered, is a very pleasant way to pass ninety minutes.
IIn The Land Of WomenI attempts to be a chick flick that revolves around a sensitive male lead, something that distinguishes it from the droves of other pseudo-romantic movies. But there is nothing about it that rings true--its a huge misfire that falsely parades around like something important. You know youre in trouble when Sarah says, I dont want to look back on my life and wonder which part belonged to me, and its intended to be wildly profound.
The big difference between IVacancyI and all the torture-porn movies Hollywood has been flooding the horror market with lately is that this one doesnt expect its audience to get off on violence. Where movies like IHostelI are constructed to glorify the next sick, twisted kill IVacancyI is a flashback to a time three years ago? when you were actually supposed to root for the films protagonist to survive. After spending the past few years wallowing in horror movie perversion, frankly, its kind of a relief.
Youd think after the countless movies where jealous husbands kill their wives women might take a few extra steps to ensure that their spouses arent complete psychos before embarking on scandalous affairs. And if youre married to Ted Crawford Anthony Hopkins, a super-intellectual obsessed with building strange marble structures, you probably should have seen the warning signs.
Between Midnight and 5 a.m., Ray Liotta will have the most confusing five hours of his life. Hes a district attorney who just found out that his assistant D.A. who also happens to be his secret lover has killed a man who was trying to rape her. Or was he? A mysterious smooth talker LL Cool J shakes Liottas confidence with a tale of his assistant D.A.s involvement with a notorious gangster Liotta has been chasing for years. From there were with Liotta every step of the way, as he runs from interrogation room to interrogation room saying, Whats going on?
Thats not to say the acting is all bad. It just isnt very good. Truly talented actors like Tim Matheson and Angus Macfadyen are lost here, playing one-dimensional gamblers. Mathesons gambler always wins, and Macfadyens Michael is just way out there. Neither character is explored very deeply, although thats fine because that would take away from the racing. Eddie Griffin is great at delivering his characters one-liners, but thats because hes Eddie Griffin. Im going to be completely chauvinistic here and state that Nadia Bjorlin is one of the hottest starlets to appear on screen this year.
IPathfinderi is not just a bad movie, its the equivalent of a cinematic abortion. Some of the horrible ideas can be written off due to the tales status as a legend but that doesnt excuse the technically poor work behind the movie. Its safe to say that Karl Urban and Clancy Brown deserve better than a movie like this, and if this is the best Nispel can do hes about to give Uwe Boll some competition in the Worst Director category. At least Boll can excuse away his work as a tax write off. Theres no excuse for IPathfinderI.
Its an easy opening to the story, one which unfolds in the first few moments of the film, but its also where it hits a lull. What would otherwise take twenty minutes and three commercial breaks in an episode of CSI is drawn out into over an hour of sleepy undercover work and sometimes painful melodrama. Things get interesting when Giovanni Ribisis character is involved, but that can be attributed to the fact that the guy is just an amazing actor to watch. If you ask me the real twist in this movie is that Halle Berry has an Oscar and Ribisi doesnt.
If you know anything about PETA, then you know that theyre infamous for going too far. Theyve taken a good idea, caring about animals, and stretched to an extreme so bizarre theyve become even worse than they people theyre fighting against. Most good ideas are that way. Theyre only good ideas as long as you dont overdo it. Good idea: giving your dog a bath. Bad idea: getting your dog dry cleaned. Anyone else just have an Animaniacs flashback?
If you want to compare IDisturbiaI to something, its almost exactly like the Tom Hanks comedy IThe BurbsI, only without any attempt to be funny and with a bunch of annoying, too-perfect teenagers. Its like someone took IThe BurbsI and cross-bred it with the career of Freddie Prinze. Jr. In case youre wondering, thats not a good thing. That stuff in the back of your throat is bile. This is the spot where youre supposed to gag.
There is an alarming drought of good romantic misfit movies, which is why IEagle Vs. SharkI should come as a pleasant surprise to those who are wearing out their copies of IGhost WorldI and IAmerican SplendorI. Give Seymour and Enid and Harvey and Joyce a week off, and meet Lily and Jarrod, the latest pair of awkward, fumbling outcasts to be struck by Cupids off-kilter arrow.
IBlack BookI is director Paul Verhoevens first Dutch film since 1977, when he left Holland for Hollywood and directed films ranging from the highly entertaining IRobocopI to the embarrassing IShowgirlsI, which Janet Maslin of the New York Times memorably described as a bare-butted bore. Verhoeven hasnt had a critically successful film since 1997.
IPlanet TerrorI is out of control, over the top, and a lot of fun. Rodriguez goes out of his way to take advantage of everything this crazy exploitation medium offers him. Quentin Tarantino on the other hand uses it to make IDeath ProofI, a talky movie about skanky club chicks hanging out in Austin and getting mildly stoned. I cant believe Im saying this, but I think maybe Tarantino missed the point.
What hath God wrought? Thats the question the poster asked of me as I walked into iThe Reapingi. Once the movie was over I still wasnt exactly sure what it was God was supposed to have wrought, but I can tell you exactly what the filmmakers hath wrought: a steaming pile of crap.
Have you ever turned on the TV and wondered what the hell the network was thinking when they gave the green light to a ridiculously crappy show while canceling your favorite drama? Freaks and Geeks fans know what Im talking about, and so does the series one time director Jake Kasdan, who created iThe TV Seti to give us a glimpse at the network process that recently shoved aside the critically acclaimed drama The Black Donnellys in favor of reality drivel The Real Wedding Crashers.
IAre We Done Yet?I is a dangerous film. Not just because its awful and it is godawful, and not just because it makes you hate everyone in it even John C. McGinley. Its dangerous because its the kind of movie that makes you hate the people who like it too, its the kind of film that if you see it in someones DVD collection you wont be able to help but judge them, and find them wanting.
There is something strangely alluring about liars, cheats and sneaks. Perhaps its that they appeal to our dark side, inviting us to root for them even as they deceive those closest to them and duck beneath the law. There have been a few successful portraits of dishonest men in recent years, including Stephen Glass in IShattered GlassI and Frank Abagnale Jr. in ICatch Me If You CanI, and heres a new one to add to the why-do-I-like-this-guy list: Clifford Irving in IThe HoaxI.
Levitts performance is quite brilliant not the kind of thing youd expect from a kid who grew up playing an alien on 3rd Rock From the Sun, but its Scott Franks commitment to use Chriss condition as a catalyst and not as a definition of the character that makes IThe LookoutI an early contender to be one of the best pictures of 2007. But Ive gotten my sequencing out of order. I really should start at the beginning, not the end.
I imagine the whole thing probably began with some guys sitting around with nothing better to do than channel surf. Coming across one of those figure skating competitions that randomly run from time to time, someone says, dude, is there anyway that ice skating could be any gayer? They all chuckle stupidly at the question but one of them thinks to himself, yesyes it could.
Given Disneys recent track record I think IMeet the RobinsonsI is quite an achievement. Whats really perfect is that they made it happening by following the same advice they dish out in the film: Keep moving forward. Disney keeps moving forward. In the future, their computer animated movies will move forward with Pixar, but its nice to see that Disneys crew managed to go out on a high note.
Like IShaun of the DeadI, IHot FuzzI is not a parody film. Its only half a parody film. Pegg and Wright staunchly avoid devolving into the easy jokes and lame Leslie Nieslon pantsless punch lines that define your average parody flick, but they dont shy away from re-enacting the genre clichs of their favorite action movies. Unlike IShaunI though, they dont put much effort into picking apart the action genre while they do it. In fact, the first half of the movie isnt really a buddy cop film at all...
From IKing KongI and IGodzillaI to IThe BlobI and IJawsI, cinematic monsters leave us both in awe and terror, as we contemplate our affect on nature. In its bold continuation of the monster movie tradition, IThe HostI is both shocking and surprising, but not because of graphic violence or exploited terror. It breaks from genre conventions so quickly, that you are left off-kilter, not knowing what to expect next. Its a monster movie that plays like the filmmakers have never seen another monster movie, and its a breath of fresh air in a rather stale genre.
The final product is the weakly conceived derivative of iThe Bourne Identityi crossed with iThe Fugitivei rounded off with a bizarre finale bent more on placating people angry at politicians than providing an enjoyable ending to the story. Its a shame. Theres a solid action thriller movie in there somewhere but director Antoine Fuqua strikes again with the same muddled storytelling style that made iArthuri such a massive disaster.
Make no mistake, IThe Hills Have Eyes 2I is the embodiment of everything that is wrong with the mainstream horror genre. As a sequel to last years remake, it is the stuff direct-to-video sequels are made of, except that you pay 10 to see it in the theaters. Although this sequel has enough common sense not to offer up a baby-at-gunpoint gang rape scene as its center piece, it comes close. Predictably its an empty, grotesque glorification of torture and rape.
The movie is mainly about their friendship and how they help each other reclaim their zest for life. It all sounds awfully hokey, but Binder is smart enough to keep the tone light for most of it, showing them hanging out and doing guy things in between Sandlers spontaneous fits of rage in clubs or office lobbies. Hes blocked out his old life, and if someone dares to bring it up to him, he goes all kinds of ballistic.
The Aqua Teen Hunger Force defies description. Its animated, but only barely. Calling IThe Aqua Teen Hunger Force Colon Moviefilm For TheatersI an animated movie would be kind of like calling a wheelbarrow an automobile. The animation is crappy, but on purpose. Its probably a little more fair to legitimately animated films to label this a cartoon. But its not a cartoon for kids. Theres a reason the original television show on which the movie is based airs only late at night on the Cartoon Network, as part of the ass end of their Adult Swim programming block. If your kids are watching Aqua Teen Hunger Force, then youre a bad parent andor probably stoned.
Based on the acclaimed sci-fi short story Mimsy were the Borogoves by Lewis Padgett, iThe Last Mimzyi transports us to a time a.k.a. right now when a civilization obsessed with technology begins to lose all trace of human interaction. In this not too distant future, rebellious Noah Wilder and his little Lisa Simpson wannabe sister Emma discover a mysterious box floating in the ocean outside their Pacific-Northwest beach house.
Anyone who was a kid around the time the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles first became popular has to be excited about ITMNTI. The Turtles represent everything thats good about the inner child most men have lurking deep down inside them kept right next to our secret desire to possess our very own robot pal, and having them back on screen is a good thing. Or at least it should be. Heres the thing: Youve grown up. The Turtles havent.
On the surface level, IDead SilenceI is almost identical to the PG-13 thrillers we get far too frequently like IDarkness FallsI, right down to the childhood myth which is tied to the supernatural threat of the story. In fact, the basic advertised premise of this movie the scary ventriloquist doll is straight out of an episode of Buffy the Vampire Slayer, and not one of the good episodes in the later years when the show finally had its act together. Im talking a Season One episode when the show barely had any legs.
What would you do if you were mistaken for a terrorist and shipped away on a mandatory vacation to Abu Ghraib prison? Chances are you would be more than a little pissed about it, and looking to vent your frustrations to the world. The documentary IThe Prisoner or: How I Planned To Kill Tony BlairI is that cathartic outlet for Yunis Khatayer Abbas, an Iraqi journalist who was falsely accused of plotting to assassinate the long-standing U.K. Prime Minister.
IBelieve in MeI offers a paint-by-numbers story that follows a the new basketball coach in a small Oklahoma town in the 1960s who is assigned to the girls team. Despite the storylines familiarity, the film side steps the common inspiration sports movie pitfall of being over-wrought with sentiment. And that goes a long way in making the film as watchable as a lazy Saturday-afternoon matinee, allowing us to get caught up in the melodrama as you watch the dependable story play out just as youd expect it to.
Based on a sophisticated French movie called IChloe in the AfternoonI, II Think I Love My WifeI casts Rock as a married man named Richard. Richard has a wife, two kids, and a great job. He loves his job, he loves his kids, his wife is beautiful, smart, and a great mother. Richard is bored out of his mind. Richards also pretty normal. Every relationship hits that place where things just seem to have gone completely flat.
As a sports movie IPrideI doesnt quite work, but Im not sure they could have done it any better. This is based on someones life after all, and the only way to amp things up to traditionally acceptable sports tension levels is by adding fiction and fabrication into the script. IPrideI simply tells Jim Elliss story as it is, for better or worse. They get the period right, sell it with some toe-tapping music, and give Terrence Howard room to shine. Elliss story isnt flashy, its not exciting, but the film does manage to convey what it is about him thats so inspiring. IPrideI made me admire Jim Ellis and everything hes done for his community. Im just not in love with the idea of turning his life into a movie.
Slick effects and steady-cam shots are replaced with uneven lighting and somewhat jarring camera moves more commonplace in home movies, but in Lynchs hands, it never feels amateurish. Its an experience that resides somewhere between a fictional movie and a one-man documentary. Its cinema for a new age. Although the confrontational avant-garde aspects of IInland EmpireI will deter the majority of the movie-going public, its a film that will rekindle the hope of important cinema in those who have come to feel that cinema is dead.
Who are these people outside of their obsessive-compulsive desire to nail this guy? There is plenty of opportunity to flesh them out, but by the time the film ends, all we know is that Toschi likes animal crackers, Avery doesnt like people to loom by his desk and Graysmith marries a woman Chloe Sevigny after the worst first date in history. Beyond that, they are nondescript people, the types youd pass in the mall on the way to the food court and promptly forget.
Though its a flawed effort, IThe NamesakeI is worth seeing for its unflinching depiction of family hardships and stunning cinematography. Director Mira Nair IMonsoon WeddingI, turning in her most personal film to date, captures so many gorgeous shots of India that it plays like the countrys greatest tourism commercial. After seeing the Taj Mahal and then having the lens zoom onto the umpteenth icicle dangling from a New York tree, its hard not to empathize with Ashima and dream of a one-way ticket back.
Lets get something straight about I300I right off the bat. This is not a movie about brave rebels fighting against some oppressive regime to safeguard freedom and democracy. When King Leonidas shouts For freedom! hes not talking about truth, justice, and the American way. Its mostly just jargon tossed into the trailers and the film for dim, easily manipulated people who get overly excited when they hear propaganda thrown around, you know, the type who arent big on paying attention to context.
When you hear that the title of a movie is iAmazing Gracei its a little hard not to be at least a little dismissive. Seriously, if a movie is going to name itself after a popular 18th century Christian hymn I for one immediately become suspicious that Im in for some kind of superficial, over-the-top, spiritually exaggerated, feel-good chronicle of some song-writing ministers conversion. To my great surprise the film is far from any of those things. With its dubious title and fluffy PG rating I fully expect the movie to be generally ignored by American audiences, but it will truly be their loss.
As a half hour television show, Reno 911 is the best thing to hit Comedy Central since John Stewart. As a movie, its like a spandex banana hammock stretched out over Lt. Dangles crotch. Funny, but frighteningly thin. The whole gang from the television series is here, only theyve switched cities. Lt. Jim Dangle Thomas Lennon and the crew of the Reno Sheriffs department have been invited to a police convention in Miami Beach.
IWild HogsI breaks down into a group of individual scenes which all follow pretty much the same formula. Travolta, Allen, and Lawrence talk about or do something biker related, and then William H. Macy says or does something funny. It happens over and over again throughout the movie, and the only time the script breaks from that rigid format is when Macy wanders off by himself to leave the others without their comedy relief. Then the baton passes to Lawrence, who postures and flails around doing his overconfidence gag.
