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Hallmark invented a holiday, which means I have to take off early today (But I will be drunkenly seeking refuge here from my Mom's computer room after a few minutes of family time) so I leave you with something I dearly love. From The Larry Sanders Show: "The Egging."
Entertainment Weekly is ranking the best guest stars to appear on The Simpsons. How the hell did they miss Ron Howard and Mel Gibson? And Mr. Burns' whole ringer baseball team? See who else they snubbed here.
Someone's taking children's scribbling and gussying them up with some kind of magical computure special effects. It think it's pretty nifty. However, I'm having tech woes and can't seem to publish more than one image in a post, so enjoy the gallery here. Stupid tech trouble.
Mike Gilbert, O.J. Simpson's former manager, has a tell-all coming out. According to an AP reporter who got an advance copy of the book, "He said Simpson had smoked pot, took a sleeping pill and was drinking beer when he confided at his Brentwood home weeks after his trial what happened the night of June 12, 1994. Simpson said he went to his ex- wife's condominium, but did not bring a knife with him. Simpson told him Nicole Brown Simpson had one in her hand when she opened the door."
"In a soft mumble, Simpson told him: 'If she hadn't opened that door with a knife in her hand ... she'd still be alive.'
"'Nothing more needed to be said,' Gilbert writes. 'O.J. had confessed to me. There's no doubt in my mind.'" [AP]
What does it say about a story when an editor at The New York Times resorts to snark? Is this part of that whole Times loosening up thing? Is it a way to soften the blow of a really wordy article on a topic that no one seems to know anything about? Take this, for instance.
"In recent weeks, some analysts have started to talk about prices rising to $200 a barrel. But not everyone is so glum. Some experts say that today’s prices have resulted from a speculative bubble that is increasingly disconnected from reality. Energy economists at Lehman Brothers argue, for instance, that oil prices are just as likely to fall to $80 a barrel as they are to rise to $200 a barrel." [NYT]
From dirty pillows to wire hangers, Rotten Tomatoes is rating the worst moms in movie history, complete with video goodness. Oh, they list the best moms too, but so what? My personal choice after the jump.
I still don't understand what Web 2.0 is, but the next version is coming and I fear it. I don't want my MacBook getting inside my head—hell, even I don't want to be in there! "[T]he Web 3.0 browser will act like a personal assistant. As you search the Web, the browser learns what you are interested in. The more you use the Web, the more your browser learns about you and the less specific you'll need to be with your questions. Eventually you might be able to ask your browser open questions like 'where should I go for lunch?' Your browser would consult its records of what you like and dislike, take into account your current location and then suggest a list of restaurants."
"Some Internet experts believe the next generation of the Web — Web 3.0 — will make tasks like your search for movies and food faster and easier. Instead of multiple searches, you might type a complex sentence or two in your Web 3.0 browser, and the Web will do the rest. In our example, you could type "I want to see a funny movie and then eat at a good Mexican restaurant. What are my options?" The Web 3.0 browser will analyze your response, search the Internet for all possible answers, and then organize the results for you." [HowStuffWorks]
Yeah, yeah, I know, Zach Braff gets on people's nerves. But, know what? Scrubs is still one of my favorite sitcoms ever! And this week I was all mopey because I believed the lies NBC was spreading that Thursday's episode was the "the final Scrubs" when actually it's just moving to ABC. So, here is one of my all-time favest Scrubs gags. What's yours?
The anonymous jerk who blasted Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull on Ain't It Cool News "is a theater executive who saw the film at an exhibitors’ screening this week. He spoke on condition of anonymity to avoid reprisal from the studio." Problem? "Theater executives may have an incentive to play down a movie’s prospects after such a screening, to get better terms." You see? This movie is going to be awesome! [NYT]
Jackie Warner, star of Bravo's Workout and lesbian fantasy girlfriend to straight women everywhere, is in trouble for being mean on the show and getting called "a negative icon to the gay community." In response to complaints from Warner's former fans, salty green water purveyor and Workout sponsor Gatorade is ending its relationship with the program. The sports-drink giant told the angry mob: "We have notified Bravo we no longer wish to be associated with The Workout and will be pulling our commercials. Furthermore, we will not renew our sponsorship of this program in subsequent seasons." But wait! A new sponsor has stepped forward!
OMG! The final episode—for now!—of MTV's semi-reality trainwreck The Hills is almost here and who can wait? I have no idea what's going on, but Heidi Montag and Spencer Pratt sure do look shouty and angry! Watch it here. [via OhNoTheyDidn't]
"Arthur Sulzberger Jr., chairman of The New York Times Company, and his wife, Gail Gregg, have decided to separate, they said in a statement issued Friday. Mr. Sulzberger, 56, who is also publisher of The Times, and Ms. Gregg, also 56 and a painter and writer, said the decision to end their marriage was amicable."
“'We have made the difficult decision to separate after 33 years of marriage,' their brief statement said. 'We are fortunate to have the love and support of our two children, other family members and close friends and colleagues. This is a private matter and we will not discuss it further.'
"The couple have two grown children. In February, Mr. Sulzberger transferred ownership of the family’s apartment on Central Park West to his wife."
Anyway, that's what the Times is going with. Post? Daily News? Some dirt, please?
"News Corporation, the global media conglomerate controlled by Rupert Murdoch, is withdrawing its bid to purchase Newsday. The withdrawal of the bid was first reported on the Web site of The Wall Street Journal, which is owned by the News Corporation.The bid withdrawal appears to be a reversal from Wednesday, when in the News Corporation’s earnings conference call Mr. Murdoch voiced skepticism that Cablevision could succeed in its bid for Newsday, even as he vowed not to get into a bidding war for the newspaper, which was at the center of a tussle among three New York moguls."
"Mr. Murdoch spoke on the call with Wall Street analysts and the press after the release of quarterly earnings from the News Corporation, the global media conglomerate he controls. On the call, he said, 'No, I don’t think Cablevision will prevail; just be patient for a couple days.'
"Several weeks ago it appeared that News Corporation had a tentative deal to buy Newsday, based on Long Island, for about $580 million, but two other bidders have come forward.
"Mortimer B. Zuckerman, the owner of The Daily News, matched Mr. Murdoch’s offer, while Cablevision, the Long Island cable operator that also owns Madison Square Garden and the New York Knicks and Rangers, was a late entrant but upped the ante to $650 million." [NYT]
Also? Murdoch gave bubonic plague to three of the Seven Dwarves.
Former Wall Street Journal managing editor Paul Steiger was tapped to write News Corp. Chairman Rupert Murdoch's profile in Time's "100 Most Influential People" feature. So what does Steiger, who retired from the Journal last year after handing it over to Murdoch—who is evil—think of the media baron?
"There is, to be sure, a darker side to Murdoch's influence and legacy. He has at times subordinated the journalism operations he controls to further his own business interests, undermining their credibility if not their long-term profitability. His own test of journalism sometimes seems to be what sells—no less but also no more. Yet Fox News, which many liberals decry as a conservative political pander by Murdoch, is actually best understood as a product designed to fill an untapped market niche in video news. It succeeded brilliantly.
"A return to his roots and a victory lap of sorts, acquiring the Journal poses for Murdoch perhaps his greatest test as a publisher. He aspires to make money and extend the paper's reach while maintaining its prestige—a tall order, even for him." [Time]
Also? I once saw Murdoch eat a baby pony. [Disclaimer: I hate Rupert Murdoch.]
What happened this week on The Sci-Fi Channel's space disco Battlestar Galactica? I dunno. I was blotto and thinking about Smurfs. But I took notes, as always. There was more shooting than usual, which is always nice. After the jump, spoilers! Maybe!
Novelist Nicholson Baker's new non-fiction tome, Human Smoke, details World War II through a series of wispy, "Gawker-like vignettes" of 100 to 200 words each. The New Republic's Anne Applebaum thinks that approach is crap.
Just in time for Mother's Day, a collection of paintings by pop-art psychopants Michael Pucciarelli is available for your viewing pleasure. What's it have to do with Mother's Day? I dunno, ask my shrink. Oh, wait, I don't have one! Some faves after the jump.
[MDolla]
If you're a talking head with no background in journalism to speak of and you work at News Corp.'s Fox News Channel, by all means feel free to lie your silly ass off about anyone who disagrees with you all while glibly maintaining that you have no strong ties to the Republican party. If you're a young production assistant at that depraved stinkhole, do not reveal in passing that you voted Republican. Because the pricks you work for will fire you.
"A 24-year-old Fox News Channel production assistant was fired this morning for something she said during the red carpet arrivals at the Time 100 Gala last night.
"Insiders tell us the assistant, identified as Jennifer Locke, was on assignment with a camera crew to cover the entertainment angle of the event. When Sen. John McCain walked by, the assistant said, 'I voted for you in the primary, you're going to win.'
"McCain was overheard saying to her, 'You're not supposed to reveal that.' Locke apparently continued to explain that she is the daughter of a Vietnam veteran.
"Insiders who were at the event were surprised and shocked to hear the disclosure, which was recorded on videotape. A Fox News insider called it 'journalistically unacceptable.' An FNC spokesperson would not comment on the personnel matter but did confirm Locke is no longer with the company, where she'd worked for a couple of years. [MediaBistro]
Early buzz over Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull is kind of pooh. First, co-star John Hurt bad-mouthed the flick and executive producer George Lucas to the Times of London, saying, "It's cops-and-robbers stuff. And it's all to make Mr. Lucas an extra billion, as if he needs it." Now the basement-dwelling fanboys at Ain't It Cool News are crying like a bunch of YouTube commenters.
"This is the Indiana movie that you were dreading [...] There was not a single moment that I thought [Indy] . . . was in any sort of peril or even significant inconvenience.' A big snake that appears in one scene is 'as crappy as a Mad TV prop' and it 'looks like the whole jungle was made of plastic.' As far as Ford's dialogue goes, 'he has a few lines that work and a million that don't.'" [P6]
I'm not too worried. I haven't believed anything on that site since they gushed all over Daredevil.
So Chris Matthews' new hair. It's... odd. Off-putting, at first. But doesn't it remind you of something? The hair, perhaps, of another man? A man who might hold the very job that Chris Matthews covets so dearly? Almost, Chris. Almost. [HuffPo]
Rudy Giuliani stopped to piss at Nespresso Boutique Bar in Manhattan today. According to a flack, who found this information worthwhile enough to blast out to the world via email, "he promised to return and sample Nespresso's coffee drinks another day." Nespresso: good enough for a fascist to piss in, though their coffee sucks.
Adweek got its hands on a leaked copy of an internal investigation from Hunter College about the school's shady Coach-sponsored PR class teaching kids how to be dishonest corporate shills, which we covered earlier this week. They say it was a bad idea! For a more detailed summary, go read the story. [Adweek]
Boa-sporting Mediabistro.com proprietress Laurel Touby continues unabated in her menacing campaign to misuse email—an invention originally designed to simplify communications. Her latest infraction: in order to promote an upcoming "Mediabistro Circus," she decided to save a little time by sending a mass email to her entire contact list—all 2,000 people. The message starts off with an apology to those who "hate my guts," which is a good sign that perhaps it would be better to pursue a different outreach strategy. The entire ill-conceived email, after the jump.
Okay,This is a little embarrassing. Please bear with me if you:
a) are a former lover
b) haven't heard from me in years
or c) hate my gutsMy conference director asked me to "invite friends" to get a special
discount on the Mediabistro Circus we're doing May 20-21 — and I realized
that my list is over 2,000 people long, so I just invited everyone in my
Outlook Contact sheet. And you were in there!!In any case, the conference is going to be AWEsome. It's our first
conference and I'm excited about it because it's shaping up to be exactly
what I wanted it to be: two days of inspired programming designed to bring
very senior-level media people up to speed on what's happening in digital
media.[Pitch here for "Circus" REDACTED]
So far, we're expecting about 300 very senior-level people (CEOs, SVPs,
EICs, Creative Directors, etc) and I'd really love to have you there, too.
That is, if you are still my friend after this :) Let me know if you're
interested and I'll get you some sort of friends 'n' family discount.Questions? Email me back. Complaints.... er, email me back those, too.
Love,
Laurel
[Confidential to Laurel: May be wise to remove Nick Denton from Outlook contact sheet.]
Tim McGuire used to edit the Minneapolis Star & Tribune. Now he gives cranky speeches about journalism. He recently told the Northwest International Circulation Executives that they have to "make their own sandwiches," which is maybe code for something. Or maybe literal! He goes on to say that thousands of newspapers will soon die but let's not worry about it, they were weak and deserved to go. Also: Thomas Friedman wrote a "tremendously important book" so you really don't have to take anything he says seriously. [McGuire on Media via Romenesko]
The big news of the week (for me, what are "primaries"?) was Gossip Girl's epic stunner of an episode in which, in the thumping crazy final seconds, we discovered that newly pious Serena van der Woodsen was a murderer. Murder! Big news! The news today is, as it is every Friday, that, li






